One of the best ways to lose self confidence and therefore self esteem is to not keep a commitment to yourself
Its easy to not keep a commitment to a third party and then try to rationalize the reasons. Sub consciously you lower your esteem there also.
However when you don’t keep a commitment to yourself, inspite of all the rationalizing, in your heart you know you cheated yourself and that hits your self esteem badly and your confidence as well.
You however need to be careful with making commitments both in terms of quantity and the type of commitments. Too many commitments is a recipe for disaster because you don’t have so much will power or motivation in a day.
If you don’t have the capabilities and you still make a commitment, you are bound to fail anyway inspite of your intentions.
I have found the book Tiny Habits by B. J. Fogg to be an amazing handbook to create small interventions which don’t need will power or motivation and slowly become part of your behavior. He has a very succinct formula which he calls the Fogg Behavior Model
B=MAP where B is behavior, M is motivation, A is ability and P is prompts.
As these small interventions start having an impact and you start keeping commitments to yourself, automatically your self confidence goes up and you start aiming for even higher without doing any heroics.
I have multiple posts in which I have recommended this book. If you have not read it, please do. It will have a major impact on your self esteem and self confidence.
Till next time then. Keep commitments to yourself first.