I have observed that as we grow up – we always keep postponing being Happy. We keep thinking when I have”xxx” money I will be happy or when I get a job I will be happy or when my child graduates from college then I ill be happy. Its like you are travelling west towards the horizon and the horizon just keeps moving as long as you are travelling.
Another issue is, that those of us living in democratic countries especially, have got into the habit of finding fault with everything and complaining. This does not mean that you should not want more from life, the city, the government etc. but finding fault with everything only makes you cynical and unhappy.
There are three methods which I have learned over the years to keep me happy.
One of these is the feeling I get by giving. Whether you believe in God or you believe in Karma, whatever. If you give anything – money, your time or food etc. – to someone less fortunate than you, it gives me immense happiness.
Another is to always live in gratitude – again whether you believe in God or just be in grace = for even the smallest things. Like having a house to live in, while there are still a lot of people right now in the winter who are sleeping on the road. While being stuck in a jam, thanking God that I am sitting in an Air-Conditioned car while there are people walking on foot in the hot sun.
The third method which I learnt recently after I read the book – Code of the Extraordinary Mind by Vishen Lakhani. He has given a very good method to the get into a Happy state. Instead of looking forward and getting frustrated with what has not been achieved, he suggests looking back and seeing how much of the road you have already travelled .
Last week when I was doing a review with my team members, I noticed all of them had glum faces. After my lecturing on why they need to be happy, one of them happened to ask me if I did not feel frustrated some times.I am also human and there are times when I do feel low.
However with these methods, I am able to come out faster from my negative state. As Tony Robbins says gratitude and frustration/anger cannot go hand in hand. The moment you start getting in a state of gratitude, your frustration levels will fall dramatically.
So go out live Happy!!